Until Only Silence Remains

lose-myself

Within my mind

The howling soul

Shrieks and screams

In pain and anger.

“What a stupid whore you are!”

“You are not worth the truth!”

“No one REALLY cares about you,

Nor WILL anyone care!”

Over and over the voices come

Louder than before

More hateful than ever

So loud and insistent

I can no longer hear my own thoughts.

Nor do I really wish to.

Vodka by the bottle

Makes me not care

Makes me numb

I used to be stone cold

Then I was numb

Then I had hope

I thought I had love…

What a crock of shit

That turned out to be.

Love is a joke

My only brother broke me

Again.

The longer I ponder

The more I wonder

What would happen

If I just left to wander

With no purpose

With no direction

With no feeling

With no care!

Perhaps I’ll see what’s on the other side

Or perhaps the Vodka

Will restore the walls

Of numbness

And make the voices

Drown!

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2 thoughts on “Until Only Silence Remains

  1. Let us be the true voices Timere. You are NOT a stupid whore! And I’ll say that for as long as it takes sweet friend. Logan was so messed up too. You know he loves you. He has so much crap of his own to sort out . Maybe a little time apart could be a good thing right now. But whatever you do, tell yourself that the opposite is true to what those voices say. The opposite. I hope you’re seeing a counsellor?
    Anyway, I’ll email you instead xo

    Liked by 2 people

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