Beginning to Soar


I can’t even begin to describe how far we’ve come in so short of a time.  Logan and I have come to grips with over 20 years of horrendous “life”.  And it was all because of caring people who wanted to help us succeed, which has been overwhelming to say the least.  We left home last Sunday and will be returning home this Sunday coming.

During our sojourn in the States, we have discovered a man who has been teaching us about perspective and about taking control of our lives and histories.  I wish there was a proper way to thank him for all he has and is doing for us.  The Rev. I’m Not Shithead has filled my mind with some important wisdom and a raging desire to live the rest of my life as fully as possible instead of hiding from it.

I love people watching (and to be honest, some of you talk loudly enough that I can hear every word of your conversation to include personal information), and in my observations, I have learned that, for the most part, we are superficial at best with one another.  When asked, “How are you?” the pat answer is usually some variation of “Fine”.  It’s as if we have lost the ability, or the interest, to truly invest ourselves in the lives of others by being true friends.

I found a quote that I thought was appropriate for this:  “We keep things casual because we buy the lie that we are unique and struggle in ways that no one else does. We get tricked by people’s public personas and forget that behind closed doors people live REAL lives just like us. We forget that life for everyone is fraught with disappointment and difficulty, suffering and struggle, trials and temptation.”  And it is true!  I thought NO ONE could ever understand what I went through.  Logan knew  what HE went through and thought NO ONE could ever understand that.  And we were wrong!

Here’s another quote from the same book: “TRUE FRIENDSHIP calls you our of the darkness of personal privacy and fear into the loving candor of mutual concern.”  And it’s true!  I have met some incredible people right here on this blogsite who are not only interesting but have gone the extra step of becoming TRUE FRIENDS!  One of them I think of as my surrogate Mum.

I could blab on and on until you fell asleep from boredom, but I won’t.  I just wanted to share what I have been taught and how much I appreciate the Rev for his gentle handling of my life of hell.  If I could give him every pence I could ever make, it would still not be enough.

Oh…..lest I forget…..we strolled to the Market Street this morning and watched these remarkable ladies craft beautiful baskets out of “sweet grass.”  I sat and watched them for a couple of hours.  Then I began to think about something I had learned: We have the ability to learn from our past and weave it into a useful tool for our present to help others in our future.



6 thoughts on “Beginning to Soar

  1. I’ve just gone back through and read every one of your posts that I’ve missed since flying to London. First, on a literary note, your poetry has grown and some of the images you use are wonderful! Second, though I’m sorry for the pain you have had to relive, it seems as if you are making incredible progress! I’m so glad you and Logan have a change of scenery and are able to work through this healing together. It fills me with hope and happiness to read how you are beginning to see how wonderful you really are and that you are finding love in your life. So many hugs to you Timere! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m beginning to be able to express the bits tinging about in my head, and getting them down in some form of poetry has been extremely therapeutic. To see live in such a different way that we never knew existed before has been such a delight!

      Working through the past has been gut wrenchingly horrid, but necessary for us to recognize the things we now have control over.

      Tomorrow, we’re taking a carriage ride tour of the city. Not sure how fresh the air will be behind a horse, but it will be a wonderful distraction for a bit.

      Love…..ah the ever elusive phantom. But the first step is to love Timere! And I now know that the Rev is right; the Grunge was evil incarnate, but he had a purpose. Because of him, we get to be here learning that we are lovable and have love to offer. True love, not the previous “10 quid an hour” kind. ❤

      And just in case I haven't told you, I love you!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. This makes me so happy I can’t even put it into words!
    We are terrible at community in western culture. But that is something my husband preaches on, and teaches about too, that we aren’t alone, that we do struggle with similar issues, ones that haven’t really changed throughout time. There is so much that unites us, if only we would take the time and effort to reach out and talk about it. I would hug the Rev myself if I could. Maybe one day, we could visit him again together. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Your husband is right. I thought I was alone in my struggles simply because I felt ashamed to share what I was having to endure. The Grunge counted on that shame and fear to keep my mouth shut. But when we are able to understand that we are not alone in our struggles, it is incredibly freeing! It is in our commonalities that true communities are built, Yet we seem to focus on our differences (however inconsequential they may be) instead of the commonalities.

      The Rev told us that we should focus more on only three things: 1) we are human; 2) we all breathe, eat, pee and poop; 3) we all need love and need to share love. Everything else can be divisive, these three are uniting.

      Liked by 2 people

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